Letter to Lori

This is a wonderfully inspiring blog. Ms. Schuster is an excellant writer, who has had quite the life to write about in the last year or so. Warning: do not expect to read her blog without crying.
http://lorischuster.tblog.com/

I wrote the following to her as I know her pain, and I wanted to give her words of comfort.

Letter to Lori:

I happened upon your site last week, looking for the lyrics of the song "Then all the world would be upside down". Hoo boy! Your world certainly IS upside down!

My dear sister, you write wonderfully! It will be your peace, I found it to be mine.

I too have had to release a little one to return to God. This was many years ago, when she was a toddler. Our situations are different, but such losses have their similarities. At the time I had encountered other people whose life as parents brought them to 'this side' of despair. They all told me that in their experience, it is true that time heals all wounds. It seemed then, as it still seems now, to me, that it is almost like a 'special club', those of us who have had children go on before us. When we discover each other, we look into each others eyes, no words need to pass. In just a look, our pain is shared, and we comfort each other with an understanding that no one else can have. (In fact, there are times I have confided to another of my little one's passing, and the look in the other's eyes tells me they know of my pain - I know before they tell me. And I have had others say the same when they were the first to confide.)

I wish I could share this look with you now, for there is comfort in it. There is comfort in knowing your cross is shared, and the burden eases a bit. I will tell you I have been crying with you, in the depth of the night when no one but God can hear. I share your pain as only a mother can. You are not alone.

19 years will have passed, June 1st, since the death of my beautiful Allison Nicole through a 'freak accident' entailing her crib. She would have been 20 this past January. I will always miss her, and at times I cry. But I do have Peace. And I can tell you that time, thru the grace of God, will heal your wounds. Your Peace will come, in time. Grieve, grieve in any and all manners, let no one rob you of it. Months and years from now, you may come across those who will not understand and may tell you 'to get on with your life' (in so many words), but your grief will be yours for a lifetime. Only it will have a balance to it. It will not be so painful in time. Grieving your child is the right of a mother's love.

I have found comfort and strength thru the example of Mary, Jesus' mother. How her heart must have broken at the foot of the cross! Every Good Friday, I find strength in her example. To stay at the foot thru such a time! She did not want the man who nursed at her breast as a babe to be alone at his death. What love! How could she have been anywhere else, though it must have pained her heart beyond belief! We know Him as our savior, God incarnate, but he was also son of man, a mother's child.

Your Beloved Ali will always be with you. From your writings I can tell she is a part of the body of Christ. You can never be parted from her because of that.

You and Megan are in my prayers.

I am sorry this is such a long "comment" but I as a nonmember was unable to send you an e-mail.

With Love
Your sister in Christ
Paula from MN
p.s. plant a garden. There’s something about digging in the earth that is very healing at this time. Many a tear has been absorbed by the earth.